Harry Potter Whose Line is it Anyways?
by Galactic Hitchhiker Michelle
Summary: *COMPLETED* (Sorry bout the wait!) Hosted by Seamus Finnigan! The performers include: Harry Potter, Draco Malfoy, Ginny Weasley, and Michelle!
1. part 1

Whose Line is it Anyways?  
  
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Seamus: Good evening and welcome to Whose Line is it Anyway?  
  
Audience: -cheers-  
  
Seamus: Tonight's performers: the biggest boozer I've ever met, Harry Potter. If your a girl, then you've gotta love Draco Malfoy. I can't believe she's not a Barbie, Ginny Weasley. And the campus bookie, Michelle. And I'm your host, Seamus Finnigan!  
  
Audience: -cheers-  
  
Seamus: Come on, let's have some fun. Welcome to Whose Line is it Anyway?, the show where everything's made up and the points don't matter. That's right the points don't matter. Just like actual talent to Britney Spears. What happens on this show is all four performers are going to come up here and they're going to totally improvise everything you're going to see tonight. And then at the end of each thing they do, I'm going to award them points, which really don't matter, because at the end of the show, I'm just going to pick whoever I like the best, so Michelle and Ginny have a good chance of winning. The winner gets to do a little something with me, and we'll go out for a few times then we'll break up.-straightens cards- So, are you ready to get started and see how it works?  
  
Audience: -cheers-  
  
Seamus: Tonight's first game is "Let's Make a Date." This game if for all four of our contestants. Ginny, you'll be appearing on a dating type game show and Harry, Draco, and Michelle are the contestants. Those three will have some strange identity and you'll have to guess what or who they are. So, start when your ready.  
  
-Harry, Michelle, and Draco open their envelopes. Draco rolls his eyes and flings the envelope at Seamus who dodges it-  
  
Ginny: Like, hi bachelor number, like, one!  
  
Harry:(changes emotions every five seconds) WHAT?!  
  
Ginny: Bachelor number one, if I, like, asked you if you wanted to "have a lil fun" what would you say?  
  
Harry: -quietly- Um... what ever you like is fine....  
  
Ginny: Well, if that's, like, what you, like, like. Bachelor numba two, like, hi!!!  
  
Michelle:(Dr. Pepper and pretzel addict) Hi.  
  
Ginny: Bachelor number two, like, where would you, like, take me for a, like, nice dinner?  
  
Michelle: Some place where they sell Dr. Pepper and pretzels.... Loooootts of pretzels! And unlimited Dr. Pepper!!  
  
Ginny: That's, um, nice.....-mutters-Cheep skate.... OK, like, bachelor number three, like, hey there!  
  
Draco: (about to commit suicide for losing his one true love, Ginny) What do YOU want?!  
  
Ginny: My, aren't you, like, the cheery one. If I told ya, like, I just, like, ended a bad relationship, what would you, like, tell me to make me feel, like, even worse about it?  
  
Draco: A BAD RELATIONSHIP?! I gave you all I could!-stands up on his chair- WHY?! WHY?! I loved you! You just through my love away! I hope your happy now!!-dives off chair and falls to the ground and pretends to be dead-  
  
Ginny: Uh, riiight.... Bachelor number one.  
  
Harry:-really excited- Hello!-on verge of crying- What do you want?  
  
Ginny: Never mind.... Bachelor number two.  
  
Michelle: I smell pretzels!! Where are they?! WHERE ARE THEY?!  
  
Ginny: I'm, like, not, like, even, like, going, like, to, like, bother.  
  
-buzzer-  
  
Seamus: Ginny, do you have any idea who they are?  
  
Ginny: Oh god.... Hmm.... Harry has really bad mood swings.  
  
Seamus: Yes!  
  
Ginny: Michelle's.... obsessed with pretzels and Dr. Pepper?  
  
Seamus: Close enough. She's a Dr. Pepper and Pretzel addict.  
  
Ginny:-snaps fingers- So close. And Draco...... was my ex boyfriend who commited suicide?  
  
Seamus: Yes!-pretends to be writing- A million, billion points to Ginny for being so damn cute, and ten hundred points to all the pretzel and Dr. Pepper addicts and the Dr. Pepper and pretzel addicts out there. Just a little something to get you to start thinking about quiting.  
  
Michelle: Wow, ten hundred points..... I'll think about quitting, now.  
  
Seamus: Glad I'm making a difference. Our next game of the night is Questions Only. This is for all four performers, starting out with Michelle and Draco. Your seen is passing period at Junior high. When your ready start the scene.  
  
Michelle: Do you know where sex-ed is?  
  
Draco: Don't you know it's in room 69?  
  
Michelle: Will you take me there?  
  
Draco: Why should I?  
  
Michelle: Don't you know I love you?  
  
Draco: Do you?  
  
Michelle: I'm holding your hand, aren't I?  
  
Draco: Where were you going again?  
  
Michelle: Don't you remember?  
  
Draco: W-...No.  
  
-buzz and Draco walks off and Harry steps in-  
  
Harry: Where's the office?  
  
Michelle: Don't you see that big sign that says "Office"?  
  
Harry: You mean that one?  
  
Michelle: Aren't I pointing to that one?  
  
Harry: How long do I have untill class starts?  
  
Michelle: Does it look like I know?  
  
Harry: Don't you go here?  
  
Michelle: What makes you say that?  
  
Harry: Doesn't the school shirt give you a way?  
  
Michelle: A-... Oh forget it.  
  
-buzz. Michelle walks off and Ginny takes her place-  
  
Ginny: Who teaches algebra here?  
  
Harry: How should I know?  
  
Ginny:-moves closer to Harry- Will you help me find my class?  
  
Harry: What do you have first?  
  
Ginny: Can't you read my schedule?  
  
Harry: What if I told you I can't read?  
  
Ginny: Will you kiss me?  
  
Harry:-puts his hands on her waist- Do you love me?  
  
Ginny: Would I ask you to kiss me if I didn't?  
  
-buzz-  
  
Seamus: I just feel like putting Michelle in.  
  
-Michelle glares at Seamus as she takes Ginny's place-  
  
Michelle:-pushes Harry away- What do you think your doing?!  
  
Harry: What happened to the red head?  
  
Michelle: What happened to my knight?  
  
Harry: What knight?  
  
Michelle: Don't you know who Orlando Bloom is?  
  
Harry: Should I?  
  
Michelle: Don't you know he played Legolas in Lord of the Rings?  
  
-Harry walks off and Draco walks in-  
  
Draco: Did you know you have very beautiful eyes?  
  
Michelle: Do you know how many times I've heard that?  
  
Draco: Will you tell me?  
  
Michelle: Do you really want to know?  
  
Draco: Does it look like I do?  
  
Michelle: Will....-pauses- you let me take you to bed tonight?  
  
-buzzer. Harry, Ginny, Draco, and Michelle(who has her hand covering her mouth) walk back to their seats.-  
  
Seamus: That's enough. I don't want you guys to re-enact Michelle's junior high years. So, 1 point a piece for reading her book, Junior High Hell. We'll be right back with more Whose Line is it Anyways? right after this commercial break!  
  
-music-  
  
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	2. part 2

Whose Line is it Anyway?  
  
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Seamus: Hey! Welcome back! If you're keeping score at home, help is being sent. -straightens cards- Our next game is Song Titles. This is for all four of you. Harry and Michelle, you're going to start the scene. This is kind of like the question game, except instead of questions, they can only speak in song titles. If you can't think of a song title or if I think the one you made up is complete and total bull, I'm going to buzz you out and the other person's going to take your place. And then I'll give the points to whoever's the cleverest person in the room. Your scene is, using song titles only, you are lost on your road trip in America. Song titles only.  
  
Michelle: Stuck in America?  
  
Harry: Loser.  
  
Michelle: Never!  
  
Harry: What I Really Meant to Say....  
  
Michelle: Uh Huh?  
  
Harry: -pauses- You're Just What I Need.  
  
Michelle: Dammit!  
  
Harry: Could I've Been?  
  
Michelle: ... No.  
  
-buzzer. Michelle walks off and Draco takes her place-  
  
Draco: Drive All Day.  
  
Harry: Christine?  
  
Draco: Cotton Eye Joe?  
  
Harry: Wait a Minute...  
  
Draco: I Want You to Want Me  
  
-Harry stomps and walks off. Ginny jumps in-  
  
Draco: Sparkle Girl?  
  
Ginny: -shakes her head- Super Girl.  
  
Draco: I'm a Fool.  
  
Ginny: Welcome to Atlanta.  
  
Draco: California?  
  
Ginny: Anywhere USA.  
  
Draco: Tell me why.  
  
-buzzer-  
  
Seamus: That's a lyric.  
  
-Draco walks off and Michelle takes his place-  
  
Michelle: Charlotte.  
  
Ginny: Debbie.  
  
Michelle: Stuck in a Moment You Can't Get Out of....  
  
Ginny: No Such Thing!  
  
Michelle: Maybe.  
  
Ginny: iF yoU C Jordan....  
  
Michelle: Boy Crazy....  
  
Ginny: It's Like That!  
  
Michelle: Too Bad....  
  
-double buzzer-  
  
Seamus: Ten points to Draco and Harry. 200 to Ginny and Michelle.  
  
-Ginny and Michelle pretend to be totally honored. Michelle blows a kiss to Seamus, who mouths "I love you". When Seamus looks down at his desk, Michelle rolls her eyes-  
  
Seamus: Our next game is called Scenes from a Hat. Now what we do is before the show, we ask our audience members to fill out different suggestions of scenes they'd like to see. And we pick the best ones and we put them in a hat. And now we're going to ask you guys to come up with as many ideas as you can based on these suggestions. Let's start out with... Lines you'll never find in Shakespeare.  
  
Michelle: Thou hast poketh me! Thou art the devil! Thou shall die!  
  
-buzzer-  
  
Harry: Get down with your bad self! -does weird dance as he walks back to his place-  
  
-buzzer-  
  
Seamus: -pulls out another slip- Things you never expect to see.  
  
-Draco steps out and beckons Harry out and they start slowing dance together. Draco slowly moves his hands down to Harry's butt. Harry jumps back before he can get any closer. Draco opens his arms out with a puppy dog look on his face.-  
  
-Buzzer-  
  
-Michelle walks out, beckons Ginny to come out, and Michelle kisses her-  
  
-Seamus hits buzzer repeatedly.-  
  
Michelle: Aw, Seamus, I didn't mean to make you feel jealous! -hugs Seamus-  
  
Seamus: -pretends to wipe a tear- It's ok.... -pulls out another slip- Stupid last words.  
  
Michelle: -pretends to aim a gun at herself- Don't worry, it's not loaded!  
  
-buzzer-  
  
Ginny: I bet I can jump off this building and still be alive when I hit the ground!  
  
-buzzer-  
  
Draco: Yeah, Seamus, that was your girlfriend I was kissing!  
  
-Seamus hits buzzer repeatedly and gives Draco a dirty look-  
  
-Michelle kisses Draco, then, Seamus hits buzzer repeatedly again. Michelle smiles-  
  
Seamus: Well, we know who's not winning now...-pulls out another slip- Other things the first man on the moon may have said.  
  
Michelle: COW!  
  
-buzzer-  
  
Draco: Maybe if I jump high enough... I can fly!  
  
-buzzer-  
  
Seamus: Ok, that's enough. Minus 30,000 points for Draco and Michelle. Our next game is Weird Newscasters. This is for all four of you. Michelle, you're going to be anchor of a news program, and Harry, Draco, and Ginny, you're going to be the co-presenters. And Harry, you're the co-anchor, and you're slowly turning into a woman. Draco, you're going to be doing sports and you're Spider-man saving Mary Jane. And Ginny, you're doing the weather, you're furious that your boyfriend dumped you for Michelle. So whenever you hear the music, Michelle, go ahead.  
  
-music-  
  
Michelle: Hello and welcome to the 9:00 news at 3 on Channel 3645. I'm Zara Anne Marie Twislemin Snapdragon. Our top story to night, purple monkeys with jetpacks have taken over Great Britain. For more on this story, let's go to my co-anchor, Gary Gayman. Gary?  
  
Harry: Thank you Zara. -voice getting gradually higher- Well, scientists believe that the jet-packed monkeys have originated from places unknown. But like OMG no one cares! -flips hair- Oh, Zara, honey, call me GiGi. Gary is such an icky name. -pretends to put lipstick on- So, as every body knows those really hot guys in the band NSYNC...  
  
Michelle: THANK you Gar... GiGi. Now for the world of sports with our sports caster, Peter Parker!  
  
Draco: Well, um, in sports today...-looks around in the audience as if his spider senses are tingling (lol). He pretends to pull off his shirt and flip on his spider mask. He then web shoots his way into the audience. He takes a random girl by the hand and holds her close as he web shoots his way back to the stage. - You ok M.J.? -the girl from the audience nods. Draco lets her go and she quickly walks back to her seat.-  
  
Harry: Ooh, he's so cute!  
  
Michelle: Thank you Peter. Now lets go to the weather desk to get this weekends forecast. Angie Fitch?  
  
Ginny: -glares at Michelle- Ugh! What does he see in you? I am way better than you.  
  
Michelle: Excuse me?  
  
Ginny: Don't pretend you don't know what I'm talking about, you little slut!  
  
Michelle: Um.. Ok...  
  
Ginny: You are so dead!  
  
-Ginny stomps over to Michelle and pretends to punch her. Michelle falls off her stool. Ginny begins to kick her. Michelle grabs Ginny's foot and pulls her down. The two begin to fight until Ginny crawls back to her place. Michelle gets back on her stool-  
  
Michelle: -pretends to wipe blood from her lip- Get over it Fitch Bitch. I'm Zara Anne Marie Twislemin Snapdragon for the Channel 364.6 news. Good night and have a pleasant tomorrow.  
  
-buzzer-  
  
Seamus: 200 points to Harry for showing everyone what his true personality is. 100 points to Michelle for coming up with those names, but minus 35.774 for using Peter Parker and for forgetting the channel. Don't go away, we'll be back with more Whose Line is it Anyway? and we'll find out who the winner is right after this.  
  
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	3. part 3

Whose Line is it Anyway?  
  
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A/n: Before I start the final chapter to this episode, I'd just like to thank all my reviewers. Oh, yes I have seen that one where Wayne has to sing to that one lunch lady as a strip-o-gram. I love that one! Well, that's sort of going off the subject… But, just to let you all know, I might be creating another episode after I finish this one. That one might include props and song styles (if I can create a song, ha ha) just for the reviewer who wanted them. So, now, with that said, on with the show!  
  
PS: I know. I know. REALLY LONG COMMERCIAL BREAK! But I've been really busy. Really, I have!  
  
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Seamus: Hi, welcome back to Whose Line is it Anyway? Tonight's winners: Michelle and Ginny. Michelle and Ginny are the winners. Like I said, nothing to do with the points, just because I like them the most. Now we go on to a game called Two Line Vocabulary. Ginny and Michelle will only be able to speak two lines while I will be able to say as many as I like. Draco what are their lines and what our scene is.  
  
Draco:-who's sitting behind the desk- Ginny's lines are: "Are they always that big?" and "What's that supposed to mean?" Michelle's lines are: "Do I have to?" and "Do you think that's a good idea?" Your scene is scientist, Seamus, found an alien space craft which he brought back to his lab where his assistant, Ginny, and co-worker, Michelle, are going to help him discover what secrets it holds. Begin!  
  
Seamus: Michelle, hand me that crow bar.  
  
Michelle: Do I have to?  
  
Seamus: Yes! Hand it to me so I can pry this hatch open!  
  
Ginny: What's that supposed to mean?  
  
Seamus: I'm going to try and get this door open with that crow bar if Michelle ever hands it to me!  
  
-Michelle hands him a crowbar-  
  
Ginny: Are they always that big?  
  
Seamus: Normally yes. Now, I'll just insert the crow bar here-  
  
Michelle: Do you think that's a good idea?  
  
Seamus: I'm the scientist, and what I do is always a good idea!  
  
Ginny: What's that supposed to mean?  
  
Seamus: Stop questioning me, both of you!  
  
Michelle: Do I have to?  
  
Seamus: No, no you don't actually.-pries hatch off- Well, Michelle, you go first.  
  
Michelle:-scared- D-do I ha-have t-to?  
  
Seamus: Okay, Ginny, ladies first.  
  
Ginny: What's that supposed to mean?!  
  
Seamus: Fine I'll go first!  
  
Michelle: Do you think that's a good idea?  
  
Seamus: Then you come up with an idea!  
  
Michelle:-whiney voice- Do I have to?  
  
Seamus: We'll all go in together.  
  
Ginny: What's that supposed to mean?  
  
Seamus: The three of us will all enter the space ship at the same time so none of us are first.  
  
-all of them step in-  
  
Seamus: GASP! An alien!  
  
Ginny: Are they always that big?  
  
-double buzzer-  
  
Seamus: Thank you for watching Who's Line is it Anyway? We'll be back next week so tune in!  
  
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A/n: I know, I know, sorry for the long wait. I'm evil I know.  
  
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